I had the misfortune to catch this bug that has been going about on NYE. Since then, I have felt like shit and narrowly avoided hospital again.
Hence the Beast has sat outside the house since NYE.........I think it has been driven three times since then. I used it last Sunday and on the way home, took it for a twenty mile run just to air its lungs. I got home, parked and locked as usual and went indoors.
I went out today for the first time since Sunday (this illness kills me at times) and went to the car to go to the quacks. As I approached, I hit the fob and noted nothing happened except the drivers door unlocked. Strange, thought I. I opened the door and wondered what was wrong. Is it a flat battery? I put the key in the ignition and there was absolutely nothing. It was as if the car didn't have a battery connected. I checked all the switches wondering if I had left any interior lights or the sidelights on. Nope.
Luckily I carry a set of leads and knocked on my neighbours door. We hooked the Beast up and boom .... all the dash lights came on and she started straight away. Hmmmmm, so off I trot to the quacks and backed into a parking spot in case I needed to jump it again. I came out and she fired straight away but I got a dash message I hadn't seen before, "Traction Failure". I drove down to my sisters, parked again and as I turned it off, the message came up again.
I spent two hours in my sisters and came out wondering if she would start. She did without the bat of an eye and there was no message. I stopped another twice before finally coming home and she has been perfectly behaved ever since leaving my sisters. On one of my stops on the way home, I did the "is my becm going to sleep" test. I sat there and after approx two or three minutes the little red light on the gearshift went out so it's going to sleep.
Now I know this is a damned good battery and less than a year old. So what the hell could have caused it to go flat? It has been parked in its usual spot so it can't be that. I shall go out tomorrow (Friday) and see if she starts but tis a mystery to me.

"GEARBOX FAILURE", "ABS FAILURE" and presumably "TRACTION FAILURE" are all pretty common faults to show up when it's running out of electricity.

Yea, I understand that, Gordon but if it was running out then why did it behave for the rest of the evening? I know I need to change my alternator as the bearings have started to sing but if it had gone kaput then I would have no elecktrickery? There is absolutely no indication that the alternator has or is failing yet.
Surely if it wasn't charging then I would know about it?

I think Shep that your battery went flat for some mysterious reason (maybe a neighbour has a new 433mhz toy like a weather station for Christmas) and the relatively small amount of running around was enough to put enough charge back in to enable you to start it,especially when the engine oil was a bit warmer and thinner, but not enough to fully charge it. You haven't driven enough miles to bring it back to full health.
Have you tried putting the battery on charge with one of the "newish" battery charger/ maintainers until the charger reports that it's happy and healthy.
Have you put a voltmeter across the battery with the engine running to see what voltage the alternator is actually putting into the battery?
If your alternator bearings are indeed singing, then maybe a planned and pre-booked replacement now will save you from a roadside failure later. No real point in waiting for it to go bang just to eke a few more miles out of it.
Good luck

When I was having problems with a flat battery due to receiver interference I would get an instant message of gearbox failure followed by abs & traction etc as Gordon mentioned already.
It wouldnt start at all though the lights etc would still work.I could jump it and charge the battery but it would only last a few days, maybe a week max.
Once I replaced the RF receiver, I never had a flat battery again.
If it turns out you need to change the receiver the P/N is YWY500170 for the latest green dot version.

But be sure that it is RF interference causing the problem 'cos you'll have to pay through the nose for the latest one (and watch for fakes!)
Cheapest used:
http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Range-rover-p38-rf-receiver-battery-drain-fix-green-spot/272521057325?
Cheapest new:
https://www.lrdirect.com/YWY500170-Receiver-Module-Remote-RR-P38/

riddlemethis wrote:

If it turns out you need to change the receiver the P/N is YWY500170 for the latest green dot version.

Its a lot of money to fork out, as OB says be sure thats the problem but if it is then the way I looked at spending a fortune for it was that I knew I would get my money back on it.
I just sold mine on ebay for £180 and that was because I wanted a quick sale. So whilst fixing RF interference problems on the car it will also retain a high resale value should you need to resell it.

When you say "just" was that the one I've just bought today??!
I'd have expected a generous RR Pub members discount if that was the case :) :)

riddlemethis wrote:

I just sold mine on ebay for £180 and that was because I wanted a quick sale.

Ha, no, it was a few weeks back.

I also got the 'ABS DEFEKT' and 'TRAKTIONS FEHLER' message (I get them in German) after fitting a new battery (109 Ah) and renewing the front halfshaft seals.
Turned out to be a not fully seated ABS sensor.

I haven't felt well enough to go out to try and start it today so will see how it is tomorrow.

Take it easy and focus on feeling better Shep. Leave the car until you feel up to it. It's only a bloody car at the end of the day. They're all fixable and you'rs is only a charging/ discharging problem that any competent garage could check for you.
Hope you feel better soon, but don't push it too early.

So I meandered out there this morning, put the key in the ignition and BOOM .. away she went after sitting there since Thursday evening in the cold.
P38s rool lolol they'll never cease to amaze us.

WHAT? She exploded?
Ah well, solves the problem then!
:)

OldShep56 wrote:

and BOOM .. away she went