rangerovers.pub
The only place for a coil spring is up Zebedee's arse.
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Joined: Jan 15 2016
Posts: 394

Batteries and computers, a salutary tale.

'tis a sunny Monday morning many years ago when our hero arrives at Manchester Airport long-stay car park, ready to leave his vehicle and catch his usual weekly flight to Copenhagen.

"Sorry mate, long stay is closed for resurfacing, use short-stay and here's a leaflet telling you what to do when you come back."

Short stay it is then and, parking up, flick the interior light on to read said leaflet.

Read, get bag, lock up and catch flight.

Fast forward to Friday evening and, following said instructions, pay for the weeks parking at the machine, at normal long-stay rates. It's about 4pm and, given the distance to my house, I am anticipating an icy cold one in my local by 5.

Arrive at car. Have to open it with the key, as battery is as flat as a witch's wossnames. Who didn't switch the interior light off, then? 5pm is slipping away.

Get jump leads, open bonnet (the "plan" here is to stand looking pathetic until someone takes pity). Key is now in ignition when the drivers door swings closed and, in a last dying act, the doors all lock again. This is called a Design Feature.

Ring the ex to put my spare keys in a taxi and send them to me. Eventually, taxi arrives, I know the driver as a fellow darts team player. Open door, hook up jump leads to taxi.

"Engine Immobilised, insert EKA." This is called a Security Feature.

The Emergency Key Access code, which, when entered via the ignition key in the door lock, turns off the immobiliser. And where do I get this from? Oh, that'll be a main dealer. At 7pm on a Friday night? Maybe not. This is called a Right Pain in the Thingy.

"Let's grab my bag and go and have a beer," I suggest to my taxi driving friend. He agrees. Beer is at eight. ???

Following morning, I arrive back at the airport, replete with new battery, call the LR specialist I bought the Range Rover from, they contact the dealer and call me back with the key code. New battery in place, EKA entered and the mighty 4.0L roars into life. :)

Now I have to pay the lost ticket charge for short-stay, about a million GBP. This is called Daylight Robbery.

So yeah, batteries and computers.

To give credit where it's due, I wrote to the airport car park service, admitting my stupidity, setting out my plight and asking if they could see their way clear to taking pity on me for the lost ticket charge, perhaps the difference between short and long-stay costs? On my return to the UK the following Friday, I'd received a lovely reply, apologising for the inconvenience, and a cheque for the full amount! :)

And yes, I do have the EKC for my current one!

Then there's the one abut the Series 2A and the detached horse trailer...

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Joined: Dec 30 2015
Posts: 1854

That's the sort of story that my wife should never hear!!

I wonder how popular P38s actually were with thieves in their heyday...

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Joined: Apr 23 2019
Posts: 462

Loving that George B.. We could definitely do with having a "Like" button on here

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Joined: Dec 30 2015
Posts: 4323

Came very close when I bought my ex-plod. Bought as a spares or repair job on eBay with a burst rear air spring and a head gasket blowing into the Vee on one cylinder so it ran on 7 from a guy in York, about 130 miles away. Went up there in the Classic with a trailer to bring it back. The battery was flat but the seller jump started it and I was able to drive it onto the trailer. Got it home and went to unload it only to find the battery was flat again. Home at that time was a flat with a secure car park but the car was outside on the road (as I didn't fancy trying the turn the trailer around in the limited space in the car park). Connected a decent battery only to see Keycode Lockout showing on the dash. Went inside to Google this and found I had to wait for it to go out. Waited, it went out only to be replaced with Engine Immobilised, etc. Now what? Googled to see what this code it was asking for was and encountered the EKA for the first time which, I was reliably informed, would be in the handbook. Only problem was that I didn't have the handbook, all I had been given by the seller was a V5 and one working keyfob. All this time it was sitting on a hired trailer that had to be back at the hire place by 5:30 and it was getting on for 3pm.....

To this day I do not know how I managed to start it without the EKA but eventually, with much running back and forth between the car on the trailer and the computer in the house, I turned off the immobiliser, start it, get it off the trailer and drive it into the car park. I suspect all it needed was to be unlocked with the fob, or maybe with the key, I've no idea, but I did it somehow. First thing the next morning I went into the local LR main dealer and got the printout with the all important EKA in case I managed to do whatever it was that had caused it to be immobilised in the first place.

I must have been very lucky with it. First job was to replace both rear air springs and, having fitted the new ones, I didn't even need any diagnostics for the EAS. I just started it up (on 7), left it running for a while and up it came.

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Joined: Aug 19 2019
Posts: 124

https://imgur.com/wOc6E7p
Hopefully the photo connects. This was us on Saturday.

enter image description here

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Joined: Dec 29 2016
Posts: 293

Harv wrote:

https://imgur.com/wOc6E7p
Hopefully the photo connects. This was us on Saturday.

I had to double take then to see if there was a chassis under that or if the body was just sat on the ground!

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Joined: Dec 30 2015
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Even after editing the post so the picture shows up, I still have one question. Where's the bloody rear wheel??

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Joined: Dec 30 2015
Posts: 1854

That is properly stuck, well done :)

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Joined: Aug 19 2019
Posts: 124

The top 3" was proper looking gravel. Under it was mire! Thank God the right side stayed on top!

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Joined: Feb 11 2018
Posts: 295

Harv wrote:

The top 3" was proper looking gravel. Under it was mire! Thank God the right side stayed on top!

Wtf is all I can say wow